Studies have found that those who want to quit or reduce their substance use do better when they have long-term motivation. It might be easy to participate in sober social activities with people who are part of a group session or who are currently undergoing treatment, but as soon as an individual leaves a treatment center, maintaining that motivation on their own can be challenging.
Some people might think that it’s impossible or not any fun to have a social life if they are sober, but a life of sobriety with strong social relationships can provide better communication and emotional quality of life.
The more an individual has social support from close friends, family, and work colleagues, the better able they are to maintain their sober selves.
Social Support and ‘Sober Selves’
One of the most important ways of maintaining a social life in sobriety is having honest communication with yourself and with others.
You don’t have to tell people everything about your recovery or your history with substance abuse, but it is essential that you are honest with people like:
- Friends
- Family
- Work colleagues
Sharing what it is you feel comfortable sharing can encourage those around you to support your sober self. For example:
Mark struggled with heavy alcoholism during his 20s. He recently completed a recovery program, but the only people who knew he was away from work for treatment were his mother, his girlfriend, and his boss.
Mark was open and honest with his work colleagues and his friends upon his recovery. This allowed him to ask for support from a work colleague when participating in work functions. This colleague would help hold Mark accountable and was there as a form of social support.
Mark even learned that several of his colleagues do not drink, and one of his friends has also been in recovery for several years but never felt comfortable coming clean about their old drinking identities.
From his decision, Mark felt validated in his new, sober self, and this support kept him motivated.
Tips for Maintaining a Sober Social Life
Whether or not you have support from those around you like Mark, there are still ways that you can maintain a social life in sobriety:
- Be Prepared: Take time in your group sessions, support groups, or individual therapy sessions to recognize personal triggers and develop strategies so that you are prepared for things like having to leave an event early when you get triggered or choosing to bring an alcohol-free mocktail to a summer party
- Prioritize Self-Care: Know that having a social life doesn’t mean you have to go to every social event or invitation; if you know that certain situations might be too challenging for you, you can avoid those parties, events, or outings
- Buddy-Up: For many people, it’s very beneficial to have support from a friend, a buddy who can give you encouragement in real time, hold you accountable, and even leave a social situation with you if necessary
- Set Boundaries: Always set boundaries with those around you and be clear about what it is you need from others
As you start to build a new social life, surround yourself with people and communities that understand your needs and uplift you in your pursuit of sobriety. Take time to learn what types of activities you enjoy. For example:
- Do you like sporting events like afternoon baseball games or Friday night hockey games? If so, can you do them without drinking?
- Do you enjoy volunteering? If so, find events where alcohol won’t be served, so you aren’t at any risk
- Are you a fan of art? If so, consider signing up for art classes but avoiding the wine and art pairings
Take time to review the types of activities you enjoy and whether or not you can continue to pursue them in sobriety. If not, reflect on what activities you might want to try, like a cooking class, hiking, or rock climbing.
Getting Help with Sequoia Recovery
As a boutique facility, we provide all levels of care to help you start your journey and break free of drug and alcohol addiction. With catered meals and on-site amenities, we can support you from detox to outpatient aftercare.
A big part of that support is using evidence-based treatment to focus on your individual needs, empower and motivate you to stay strong through your recovery journey, and help you learn how to maintain a social life in sobriety, build new friendships, or repair old relationships where necessary.
Call us at 1-866-319-1128 to start your recovery plan and learn how to maintain a social life in sobriety.
FAQs
What happens to your social life if you quit drinking?
For those who are currently struggling with alcohol addiction or drug addiction, it might be difficult to consider a life of sobriety. If, for example, you had friendships or relationships centered on activities like drinking, you might find that you no longer have a lot in common with those people.
That does not mean that you have to give up a social life.
You will learn during the course of your recovery that you can still maintain a social life and sobriety and, in many cases, by doing the same types of activities you may have once enjoyed only without the alcohol.
How do you maintain sobriety in social situations?
There are many ways that you can still have a social life and participate in things like parties, office events, and other activities while still remaining sober. This looks different depending on the stage of your recovery but might include things like having clear communication regarding your boundaries.
You don’t have to approach these situations alone. You can maintain a social life in sobriety by relying on a buddy system if you need someone to hold you accountable and selectively decide which events or situations could be potentially harmful and should be best avoided.
What do sober people do to socialize?
When you participate in any level of care at our treatment center, you will learn how to socialize without alcohol and build friendships with better communication instead of relying on drugs and alcohol.
As part of your treatment, you might participate in educational activities, outings, and other support groups where you learn what types of sober activities like games, cultural events, volunteerism, or sports you are truly drawn to.
How to be sober and keep your friends?
If you are worried about your friendships, especially after leaving a recovery program, it might be worse to talk to a therapist and reflect on how your relationships currently function. Do you currently have relationships that are inconsistent and unpredictable, reliant almost exclusively on social events where alcohol or drugs are common? Is there anything shared in your relationships beyond addiction, such as interests, hobbies, or personality traits?
When you transition to a life of sobriety you might find that some of your friends do not support you in the way that you need them to, maybe by not respecting boundaries or by not supporting your decision. It is up to you to be honest with everyone, be prepared to create a new circle of friends and new types of social activities.
